Oh Harry Beau, the stories we will have for you when you’re older. The world is in a strange place these days. People are hunkered down in their homes. Businesses are closed and unsure of when they will reopen. There are a lot of unknowns and with that comes a lot of fear. But sweet boy, let me assure you of this: Your daddy and I, and your big sister, we are not afraid for you. We have so much hope for your arrival and the plans that God has for you when the world finally gets to say hello to you. Being a child of God, born into His family, is something incredibly special and feels even more important and exciting in this weird time.
With each passing day, guidelines are changing and people are adapting to protect the health of those around them; those most vulnerable to the reaches of this nasty virus that has become the only newsworthy information in over 150 countries globally. People are adapting to protect you, sweet boy. They are sacrificing things like normal birthday parties, social gatherings, going to work. Some people are even going without a paycheck, because loving on and caring for those most vulnerable has become top priority. Its truly special to see what humankind is capable of doing. I know that your daddy and I will be forever grateful to the people who stayed home to ensure that you could enter this world and be healthy.
It has been particularly hard for me to see the joy and positives in this situation we are currently facing. I have been so sad to watch all the dreams I had for your arrival and homecoming be quickly turned to metaphorical ashes. I have even found myself whining over the things I expected and thought you (and I) deserved. Its hard not to feel the grief of losing the things I dreamed for you… It takes me right back to the same feelings I had when we learned your big brother wasn’t going to live for very long. In an instant, I lost an entire life’s worth of dreams for him. When the dust settles, I realize that though this grief is hard and real, I will still get to hold you and snuggle you; We will get to know you. Something that I took for granted before I met your brother. Something that I cannot wait to soak up with every moment I have with you.
You are entering this world in just a matter of days and the reality of that is so VERY exciting. Its not going to look very much like the birth I had hoped for (and rejoiced over), but in the end your daddy and I are going to meet you and welcome you into our family with arms so wide open - and then squeezed so tight around you - that all the details won’t even matter. We will share pictures of you with your sister until we can get home to see her. We will announce your arrival via technology and we will celebrate with all the people that have prayed over you from a distance. At some point, life will return to a normal that we recognize, and when that moment comes, you better be ready for a whole bunch of hugs and kisses. Because, Harry Beau, you have been long awaited, deeply loved, and immensely covered in prayer since even before God gifted you to us. And if I could put into words just how excited your big sister is to meet you, I would. But that would be impossible. Her joy in this waiting is such a gift from our Good Father and such an important reminder of just how joyful it really is to welcome new life into this world! Pandemic be damned, there is a celebration to be had!
We love you so dearly already, sweet boy. Cannot wait to meet you!
All our love - Mama & Daddy & Big Sister, Audrey Nole
