Two weeks with our littlest man and it feels like a blink of an eye and forever all at the same time. It hasn’t been all sunshine and roses, adjusting to life as an earthly family of 4. Big sister has definitely felt the pains of sharing her parents for the first time. And since it’s been 5 years since Adam and I have had a newborn, we are just trying to figure out this new normal - in the context of a very strange temporary normal - doing of life with Harry Beau as member of our tribe. Throw a pandemic in the mix and there’s been a whole lot of togetherness that makes this adjustment period even more complicated.
We are seriously and deeply in love with Harry Beau. Audrey tells me she can’t get enough of him, she loves him so much. It’s absolutely the truth. She is an adoring big sister who often looks and feels more like a second mama than a sissy. That’s part of their story. Their age gap will be part of what shapes their relationship from now until forever. I have so enjoyed watching it unfold over the last couple weeks. If it can bring this much joy to our home in this short time, what a gift it will be to watch it unfold over the years.
Little man is generally a pretty good baby. Thankfully! He has given us his moments (more like very long nights) of reminders that he is, in fact, not even 2 weeks old... but mostly he’s just a snuggle bug with old man grump faces, cheeks for days, and a slight resemblance to Bernard from “The Rescuers.” {don’t worry bud, I mean that with all my love} So far, our experience with him is nothing like it was with his big sister. In many ways I’m so thankful for that. It helps me to remember he is his own person and I don’t immediately draw conclusions about all the ways he might be like George; when I can’t have the same experiences with all three of my children, it somehow feels easier to have the two children be incredibly different.
I was worried about those comparisons. I almost felt sad when we found out that baby 3 was going to be a Harry instead of an Eleanor. The overwhelming thoughts at first were how hard it felt it would be to raise a little boy after not getting to raise a little boy. I’m sure that with each of those milestone firsts my heart will twinge, as we never got to experience those with George. But knowing how unique this boy is and how different from his sister, makes it easier to imagine that my middle child would have been just as unique and different. It will perhaps add a layer of grief that hasn’t yet existed, but the joys we have with Harry won’t be viewed through such a sorrowful lens. For that, I am deeply grateful.
